New trimester, came in two new students. One I still don't know him yet, but another one is sitting right beside me. She is 'replacing' Ivan. I really miss Ivan a lotttttttttttttt~once the girl sit at his place. She is graduated from diploma level. She is kinda good, willing to help and give suggestion, but there is too much, some how, the way she talk is like show off-ing. She really give me a lot of pressure. Sometime she gives me too much suggestion, even more than a lecturer, I feel awkward if I didn't follow any of her suggestions. But I just like to make my own thing, I like to listen to her advise, but not her idea.

From my work, I think I still haven't improve, although I really put in my all heart. I always read the words from others' face. I know my work is not good. Sometime, I love my work, but after seen their face, I feel down. Can I say that, you are jealous on my work so you don't want to praise me and make me happy, on the other way, if my work is really suck, you will say 'quite nice', to console me. Damn! I think too much, their face never lie!

research on first project

spray painting for first drawing class

1st project of trimester 3

At first I thought I do it quite good. I get my idea, develop it, I found suitable objects, I make a lamp from a touch light, I like my design. This is the first time I get my idea first, then develop the model from my idea. Quite a lot of people say that it was nice and cool, I wonder isn't their word is true. Some of them, who quite closer with me in the class, from their face I know it's not that nice. First lecturer said my thing is ok, because I using all objects to form my sculpture. The second one, just ask me to tide my wire nicely, and from his expression, I thought he is quite satisfy with my thing, plus he don't has any other comments. The third one, she said my sculpture look messy, and according to her, my sculpture did not present my idea appropriately. At first, I thought to change my sculpture according to her comment, but after that I feel regret, because I got no enough time to buy new material, I kinda like my origin design, what if after I change it, it will look worse and maybe another 2 lecturers do not like my thing? Then I fix back the whole thing. I feel worry, I don't know what she will think if I didn't correct any part of my sculpture, (there is actually 1 part, but I feel regret after I change it,but lucky that is just a base not a necessary thing.) I feel down and lose confident to my own sculpture. It is too simple compare to others complicated combination, but they really did a good job, combined the thing I never think of. I hate complicated. I hate trouble things. My sculpture is a form of sun flower and a sun. The main thing I want to emphasize is confident, but I lose my confident before I present my work. How I gonna do? Even a friend that is not from this course did not impress by my work, what a failure I did...


She say the 'Sun' is kinda same type with the 'flower'. The flower is not dropping enough, since I say the flower didn't get sun light so it dropped. The sun is like trapped in the ball, it suppose is a powerful sunshine, release light and energy infinity. I don't what comment I will get if I can't found a battery holder and just leave the battery lying there.God bless me, I hope I can get positive comment during my presentation.